You've created difficult patterns in your life. Patterns of self-defeating feelings, thoughts and actions that you've brought forward from previous life experiences. You got pulled into the old thoughts and behaviours. You've been digging yourself deeper into a trench that gets harder and harder to escape.
This pattern is not unknown to you. You recognize it in your relationships, in your jobs and in your beliefs, behaviours and responses. It's time to take charge of your karma by altering the inner ideas, feelings and patterns that cause you to make sabotaging choices.
Every time you notice yourself making an old choice that digs you deeper into your karmic trench, you can change your mind and your actions. This will require conscious effort every step of the way. Without this work, you could go lifetimes burying yourself in the same feelings. But with your commitment to making changes every day, you can dig yourself out!